Does this look familiar?
"Dear best regards,
Regarding your last email, bla bla-bla bla-bla-bla blabla-bla blabla bla bla-blabla.
Best/ warm/ thanks and/ regards, blablablah.
(for originality, the regards are replaced with 'Have a fantastic weekend' on Fridays or 'Have a great week' on Mondays)
Firstname Lastname
$Department
$Title (sometimes this title can get as long as 3 lines)
$Corp (for the best visual impact, a 500 kB picture may be placed here)
$Corp address (all 3 of them)
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan, continued
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan (really intelligent slogans are really long, aren't they?)
Phone: 0099asdfsd
Fax: 009988zxczx
Cell: 00764jknf
email: firstname.lastname@$Corp.com
Secondary phone: 043dfsdcfsdf
Another Fax (for sales): 0908deskfd
Other phone: 034dfdfsfsdf
Skype ID: smart-and-funny-name-sometimes-including-the-Corpname
Windows Live ID: way-smarter-and-funnier-name-sometimes-including-the-Corpname
YahooID
TwatterID
Disclaimer: $Corp cannot be sued for the content of this email, no matter how stupid the content may be. If you received this email by accident, you must delete it and forget you ever received it. And, probably, we won't sue.
This email has been scanned with $Super-Ultra-Safe-Antivirus-and-Spam. However, if you get infected we cannot be sued (see above).
Please think of the environment before printing this email."
Indeed, you have to think twice before clicking the 'Print' button. It'll take paper from four trees for those signature and disclaimer.
You really need to write your email in your signature; where else can I find it, should I need to reply?
Well, if I cannot find your email address, it's great you gave me a list of all your 35 phone numbers, 15 faxes and 8 cell numberss. Of course, each of those 35 numbers is a robot with call waiting where I give up after 40 minutes of "music" and a seizure-inducing voice asking me to press # to hear about your latest products. And you don't have signal on any of those 8 cells.
I could send a fax or write you a letter, but I cannot decide which is more fun. And which of those 3 addresses is yours? If I send a letter to the main location, can I Cc the other two offices?
But wait, that's when the IM information comes in handy.
And that's when your corporate firewall comes in handy.
Come to think of it, you're quite unreachable these days. Good thing your cubicle is right next to mine.
If I promise not to print your email in order to save the trees, do you promiss to think twice and not waste bandwidth before clicking 'Send'?
"Dear best regards,
Regarding your last email, bla bla-bla bla-bla-bla blabla-bla blabla bla bla-blabla.
Best/ warm/ thanks and/ regards, blablablah.
(for originality, the regards are replaced with 'Have a fantastic weekend' on Fridays or 'Have a great week' on Mondays)
Firstname Lastname
$Department
$Title (sometimes this title can get as long as 3 lines)
$Corp (for the best visual impact, a 500 kB picture may be placed here)
$Corp address (all 3 of them)
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan, continued
$ReallyIntelligentCompanySlogan (really intelligent slogans are really long, aren't they?)
Phone: 0099asdfsd
Fax: 009988zxczx
Cell: 00764jknf
email: firstname.lastname@$Corp.com
Secondary phone: 043dfsdcfsdf
Another Fax (for sales): 0908deskfd
Other phone: 034dfdfsfsdf
Skype ID: smart-and-funny-name-sometimes-including-the-Corpname
Windows Live ID: way-smarter-and-funnier-name-sometimes-including-the-Corpname
YahooID
TwatterID
Disclaimer: $Corp cannot be sued for the content of this email, no matter how stupid the content may be. If you received this email by accident, you must delete it and forget you ever received it. And, probably, we won't sue.
This email has been scanned with $Super-Ultra-Safe-Antivirus-and-Spam. However, if you get infected we cannot be sued (see above).
Please think of the environment before printing this email."
Indeed, you have to think twice before clicking the 'Print' button. It'll take paper from four trees for those signature and disclaimer.
You really need to write your email in your signature; where else can I find it, should I need to reply?
Well, if I cannot find your email address, it's great you gave me a list of all your 35 phone numbers, 15 faxes and 8 cell numberss. Of course, each of those 35 numbers is a robot with call waiting where I give up after 40 minutes of "music" and a seizure-inducing voice asking me to press # to hear about your latest products. And you don't have signal on any of those 8 cells.
I could send a fax or write you a letter, but I cannot decide which is more fun. And which of those 3 addresses is yours? If I send a letter to the main location, can I Cc the other two offices?
But wait, that's when the IM information comes in handy.
And that's when your corporate firewall comes in handy.
Come to think of it, you're quite unreachable these days. Good thing your cubicle is right next to mine.
If I promise not to print your email in order to save the trees, do you promiss to think twice and not waste bandwidth before clicking 'Send'?
1 comment:
He has the office next to yours, but my colleague has the office IN my office...good thing I can look at her and reply to her email so no waste of bandwidth, no waste of paper :)
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