Day one

You've passed the interviews. All six of them. Even the ones you had no idea what they were about. You accepted the offer. You've made it. And now you can't wait to start.
Firstly, wait two weeks to one month.

[Two weeks to one month later...]

This is it. First day.
You don't know exactly where to park, where the entrance is, which button is the right buzzer, which floor to go to, but you don't get discouraged. Nothing can stop you now, nothing can cloud this brilliant day. You've made it. You're at the reception. Wow, she's pretty, she has lovely eyes. A bit bored, though, but still very focused. Important work, no doubt. You should focus, too. You're here for much more important things. You're here to build your future. You're here to meet whom? No, you work here. You're colleagues. A brief flicker of interest sparks in her lovely eyes. And... Back to bored. Who should pick you up? You don't know, you thought someone was waiting for you. No, you don't remember any name from the interviews, unfortunately. Bored turns to annoyed, all the effort put all morning in the Candy Crush tournament is going to waste now. Because of you. Finally, someone in your department is found that has vaguely heard about a new guy. A small detour to get a badge. A visitor badge for now, remember to give it back when yours is ready? In 3 to 5 weeks, most likely. Anyway, you and your temporary badge are being taken to your desk. And quickly abandoned there, you colleague has work to do. Look at it, your desk! It's brilliant. Your future starts here. Although it is a bit shallow at the moment. There should something be here, right?
Time to meet the local IT. You don't know it yet, but the brilliant day is about to be shadowed by a trip to the place of no sunshine. Time for NDAs, scorn, security, slight abuse, what you can and cannot do. Mostly what you cannot do. Be humble and be humbled for the gumption to expect a working computer and phone that doesn't weigh more than the computer.

[Two to four hours later...]

Victory! A bit crumpled, but victorious. You're all set. A shiny new phone, a not-so-shiny laptop. You're all set. The possibilities are limitless, everything's at your fingertips. Not right now, but right after you'll be granted access to the Internet, to the intranet, to the applications. And a SIM card. From now on the only way is up. The first day is really great. And now, it's lunch time. Alone today, because you don't know anybody.

[A lunch break later...]

If you think the visit to the IT department was the sole cloud on this otherwise perfect day, wait till you reach the bottomless tar pit that's about to come next. Yes, it's induction time. Time to get lost in the haunted office where a coven from HR is blighting all soul and life through tepid spells impregnated on meaningless documents more painful to read than ancient witchcraft guidebooks. If you think what you went through earlier was abuse, you're in for a surprise. A nasty, nasty surprise. 'Human resources' is not a department, it is prey. Their prey. Human is just a meaningless prefix indicating the type of resources they're after. For consumption. And what could be more delicious on their menu than a young innocent soul, another naive that comes with high hopes of growing and making a difference? Yes, you! Puny human.
Who knows, though, you might be lucky. If you catch them in a good mood it'll be over in less than 3 hours. And they may even act friendly to gain your trust and give you career advice from the Facebook games they've been playing earlier where you're told what's the perfect job for you in 10 years after you've answered to 3 questions and agreed to give your email address and all your personal details.

[Three hours later, if you're lucky]

Back to your desk. You're feeling a bit confused and there's an unpleasant sense of worry slowly creeping in. Alas, you chase it away, spending the rest of the day feeling eager for tomorrow and hopeful about the next 10 years.

[6 P.M.]

That's it, this was first day. You haven't done any actual work today and have no idea what you'll be doing tomorrow, but you have a good feeling about this.
Well... Give it some time. You've only been here a day.